I write this from a place of experience and growth. Now in my 30's I believe I am in a place where I am old enough to be wise and young enough to do something about it.
With that said, it is and has always been my life's passion to help others. My mother is a motivational speaker for the Latin community. I was raised by a woman who deeply believes that happiness is found in the happiness of others. I know nothing other than to help. I have been given the gifts of love, happiness, humor, kindness, awareness, enlightenment, clarity, and most importantly positivity. It is therefore, my duty to give these gifts back to those in need of them. I wholeheartedly and sincerely believe that I was blessed with these gifts because it is my purpose on this earth to make peoples lives better.
It is in my innate nature to be compassionate to others. I have felt a calling since I was a child to listen and uplift people whenever anyone is going through a hard time.
This attraction to help led me to get an education because I wanted to be a legitimate source of knowledge for anyone who gave me the honor of helping them.
I pride myself in the efforts I have taken to be a combination of education and experience for my clients.
At the age of 25 everything in my life changed.
When I was 18 I met a guy and long story short I ended up marrying him. I moved in with him when I was young. I am Latin and in my culture traditional families frown upon living with a man before marriage...so the fact that I did this made me feel ashamed. We started having problems, but I was convinced that things would get better and that getting married would redeem me for my shame. We eventually got married and outwardly appeared to be "livin' the life". But, on the inside everything was falling apart...including myself.
My ex had a major drinking problem that provided a gateway (and an excuse) for being abusive. That man took away everything the young woman in me had achieved over the years. His abuse towards me slowly chipped away at my confidence, my happiness, my sense of safety, and even my ability to be strong-minded and opinionated. He scared me. I was terrified of upsetting him and starting a fight. Why did I stay? I was young, naive, and scared. I moved in with him when I was 19. I did not know a life as an adult without him. I grew into a young woman with him. I was scared to go off into the world by myself, but I so desperately wanted to.
Through it all...deep down inside...I knew I was born for more and for better.
At the time no one knew the extent of abuse I was enduring. Only a few key people knew that my marriage was falling apart and that we were having problems, but no one knew he was abusive. After having a conversation with my best friend about some issues she gifted me with the book, "Eat, Pray, Love".
It's only a book, but it was just what I needed at the time. It inspired me. It gave me courage to chase a better life. I was only 25 and still had my entire life ahead of me. I decided that there was a strong and brave woman in me that deserved to live in happiness and freedom and I fiercely wanted to give her that.
After all was said and done, I spent 7 years of my life with that person, so I decided that I did not want that time to be in vain. Surviving that experience taught me how strong I really am and gave me a sense of self-respect unlike I had ever known. During the aftermath I learned so much about starting over, finding myself, and getting through the most powerfully painful fears and emotions imaginable. As a survivor, I found a new sense of fearlessness, courage, and determination. I was going to live the life I wanted. I became unapologetically proud of myself. No one but me truly knows my pain and struggle through every part of that relationship, but I got out of it and for that I am eternally grateful to myself.
I decided to dedicate myself to self-growth and self-exploration. I eventually shed the shame of divorce and learned to wear it like a badge of honor. I took every opportunity to travel, meet new people, have random conversations, try new things, learned to share my space with strangers, and learned to enjoy my time alone. I pushed myself outside of my comfort zone and opened my mind and heart to the new and the different.
After several years of practicing the art of being "me" I mastered who I am.
Once I replaced shame with pride and fear with excitement my energy changed. I noticed I seemed to attract good things, good people, and great opportunities. My positivity became my super power. The more positive I was, the more I seemed to radiate positivity, and the more the puzzle pieces of my life strategically and effortlessly fell into place.
I completely transformed into a new person. The "new me" sometimes has a hard time remembering the "old me". I found love and happiness within myself. I felt free of shame, guilt, regret, sadness, confusion, and negativity. I accepted that, "Everything happens for a reason" and I was excited to see what the future had in store for me.
and then I met him...
Over the years I went on a few dates, had a few boyfriends and through those people and experiences learned that much more about who I was and what I wanted. I got to a point where I had enough dates and enough boyfriends. I decided that I did not want to waste my time on anymore temporary, we'll see, just going with the flow dating. If I was going to date someone it was going to be with purpose.
Long story short, becoming selective with my time and projecting confidence and positivity allowed me to attract the man of my dreams. It may sound unreal, but my partner is everything I have ever dreamed of and when I look at him I see the manifestation of all the very specific things I asked the universe for.
You see...he came at the perfect time once the universe knew I was ready to receive him AND once the universe knew EXACTLY what I was looking for.
Many people don't know what they want so the universe can not give it to them. You must be specific.
I took each lesson my life had given me and learned. I learned about who I was. I learned about what I wanted and maybe even more importantly what I didn't want.
I did three very important things before the universe presented me with my partner. I made a mental list of the things that were deal breakers, I made a pact with myself that I would make not make excuses for anyone that fell short, and I believed that I would eventually find what I sought. These three decisions allowed me to reject the bad which led me to find the best and together create the healthiest and happiest relationship either of us have ever had.
Life is challenging therefore relationships have challenges, but relationships do not have to be difficult, disrespectful, or damaging.
Regardless of what you may have gone through or what you may be going through...it's never too late to change the direction you are going.
Your life and love will be whatever you want it to be, but you can't create something you don't believe in.
my hope for you
Our lives are in our hands. The daily choices we make dictate the lives we lead and live. Improve on your weaknesses and embrace your strengths.
Accept the power of your energy and mindset so that you can become powerful in directing them towards living the life you truly deserve and desire.
My past is a part of who I am, but it is not a part of how I live and now I have turned my survival into my success. I hope to help you do the same for you.